Here is an excerpt of an email I received today:
I am a freshman student at ... State Univerity.
Recently, I have been doing a bible study with a man who introduced himself to me during my orientation.
The man (Doug) began to go though the Bible with me doing prepared "Bible studies". (...)
After I few weeks, I noticed that some of the lessons he taught me did not agree with what I belived with, so I asked my dad to do some research. He found this site and after I have read it, I relize that this man is part of (...) a known cult.
Doug still would like to meet with me on a weekly basis, but I do not know how to explain to him why I would not want to meet with him anymore.
It would be helpful if you can let me know a good way to "get out" without hurting the guys feelings.
Don't we all feel like we've been there?
At least I would compliment that young person for heeding the warning signals and getting some unbiased background information from a source they could trust (the dad).
However, I feel this is really the typical pattern for luring people into cults:
First, create some friendliness.
Second, make the person feel that you care for them.
Then, you can use guilt as a weapon against them when they want to leave, even if they have GOOD reasons.
This young student knows clearly that things with the group aren't just fishy, but that they got themselves involved in a "known cult", according to their own terminology. However, they can not simply "go away" because they feel that they would "hurt the recruiter's feelings".
So many young college students fall victim to cults all because they believe that the care and concern the recruiters display is genuine. They feel that they would be too harsh to just "go away" and maybe even take the blame upon themselves for "hurting the other's feelings".
We need to send out a clear voice: it's the cultists that continually hurt, belittle and reject other's feelings to further the agenda of their group, it is best to just go away for your own good and for the cultist to maybe one day ask themselves why seeking young people can not see Christ through their preaching. The person leaving such an environment shares no guilt.
The blame is entirely on the cultist, because they had been using deceptive and manipulative tactics from the beginning. No person needs to feel guilty for refusing to be deceived and manipulated!
And it doesn't matter whether that group is UBF or any other cult in the world.
Young students shouldn't naively believe that cult recruiters react the same way like they would, cult recruiters are programmed for a single purpose: get you lured into the cult without knowing it!